Reconnecting with Purpose After a Major Life Change: An Existential Perspective -

Major life changes — whether due to loss, career shifts, divorce, illness, or entering a new life stage — often leave us feeling unmoored. These transitions can shake the very foundation of who we believe we are, triggering deep questions about identity, value, and direction. The experience can be disorienting and, at times, profoundly painful.

Yet, as existential thinkers like Viktor Frankl and Alfried Längle remind us, these moments are also powerful gateways. They offer the chance not just to rebuild, but to reconnect with a deeper, more authentic sense of purpose.

In this article, we explore how to rediscover meaning after life upheaval using principles from Logotherapy (Frankl) and Existential Analysis (Längle). We’ll also link you to additional resources and offer actionable steps, including guided support through our Quest for Meaning ebook.

The Existential Void: When Life Feels Empty

Life transitions often bring with them a void — a period of emptiness that can feel like falling into an abyss. Whether it’s the silence after children leave home, the identity loss after retiring, or the aching aftermath of bereavement, it’s easy to ask, “Who am I now?” and “What is my life about?”

This feeling is sometimes accompanied by a haunting sense of loneliness — not just social isolation, but an existential loneliness, where it seems like no one can truly understand what you’re experiencing. This is particularly common in people who’ve always been strong for others or who have repressed their emotional world.

For men, especially, these transitions can be difficult to navigate. Cultural narratives often discourage emotional vulnerability, leading many to suffer in silence. If you’re a man struggling with isolation and disconnection, this piece on loneliness in men can provide insights and support.

Viktor Frankl and the Will to Meaning

Austrian psychiatrist and Holocaust survivor Viktor Frankl developed Logotherapy, a form of psychotherapy based on the belief that the primary human drive is not pleasure (Freud) or power (Adler), but meaning.

In his seminal work Man’s Search for Meaning (1946), Frankl wrote:

“Life is never made unbearable by circumstances, but only by lack of meaning and purpose.”

According to Frankl, suffering is not only an inevitable part of life but also a potential source of meaning — if we can find a way to respond meaningfully to it.

Frankl emphasized three primary ways we can find meaning:

Through work or creating something
Through love or connection with others
Through our attitude toward unavoidable suffering

When life changes drastically, the first two forms may be temporarily lost — our job may be gone, or relationships may shift. But we always retain freedom in how we respond to what happens.

Alfried Längle and the Four Fundamental Motivations

Psychiatrist Alfried Längle, a student of Frankl, expanded on Logotherapy to develop Existential Analysis, focusing on a four-layered motivational structure that helps individuals orient themselves toward a fulfilled life:

I am — Can I be? Do I have the right to exist?
I am alive — Do I like life? Do I feel it’s worth living?
I am myself — Can I be true to myself? Can I express my authentic self?
I am in the world — What is my contribution? What is my purpose here?

When a major life event occurs, it often destabilizes one or more of these motivational layers. For example:

Losing a job may challenge your sense of contribution (#4).
Divorce may disrupt your identity or sense of being loved (#2, #3).
A health crisis may trigger fear about your right to exist or physical vulnerability (#1).

Längle proposes that healing begins not by seeking immediate answers, but by asking the right existential questions — ones that open space for a renewed connection with life, yourself, and your future.

The Midlife Crisis: A Gateway, Not a Dead End

The proverbial midlife crisis is a common inflection point where people wake up and feel disillusioned with the life they’ve built. The career that once felt fulfilling may now feel meaningless. Social roles change. There’s a growing awareness of mortality.

Rather than a sign of failure, this period can be a call to transformation. If you’re currently navigating this, we recommend exploring purpose in midlife to help reframe and navigate this profound — and very human — phase of life.

When You Feel Like You Don’t Belong

A common feeling after major life changes is, “I don’t fit in anywhere anymore.” This is particularly acute after relocation, retirement, or losing a primary social role.

This feeling can create a sense of existential homelessness — a lack of place, identity, and resonance. But it can also be the beginning of a more honest life, one rooted in authenticity rather than expectation.

If this resonates with you, take time to explore “I don’t fit in anywhere” for a deeper existential look at belonging and how to reclaim your place — even if that means creating a new one.

Five Steps to Reconnect with Purpose Using Existential Tools

1. Slow Down and Listen to the Inner Stirring

Instead of rushing to “fix” your life or return to normal, take a sacred pause. Let the silence in. Meaning often emerges not through solving, but through listening — to your needs, longings, grief, and even confusion.

Exercise: Sit quietly for 10 minutes daily and simply ask: “What is life asking of me right now?” Not what you want from life — but what life is calling you toward.

2. Reclaim Responsibility for Your Life

As Frankl said, freedom is always available — not the freedom from suffering, but the freedom to respond.

“Between stimulus and response there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response.” — Viktor Frankl

Responsibility (or response-ability) is about stepping into authorship. It doesn’t mean forcing action when you’re not ready, but it does mean acknowledging that your life is yours to shape, even after devastation.

3. Reconnect with Values and Direction

Purpose isn’t necessarily a grand mission. Sometimes it’s as simple as committing to a value — kindness, curiosity, creativity — and living it out in small, consistent ways.

Ask yourself:

What did I love doing before this change?
What gives me a sense of inner aliveness?
What values do I want to embody going forward?

Our Living a Purposeful Life article walks you through this in greater depth.

4. Engage in Meaningful Dialogue (with Yourself and Others)

Existential analysis emphasizes dialogue — not just with therapists, but with ourselves. Journaling, self-reflection, and authentic conversation can help us hear the quiet voice within.

Reach out. Don’t go it alone. Even a single conversation with someone who sees you can be enough to begin rebuilding a meaningful narrative.

5. Practice Micro-Purpose Daily

Waiting for “big” purpose can leave us stuck. Instead, practice micro-purpose — small, intentional acts that carry personal meaning:

Writing a letter to a loved one
Helping a neighbor
Planting a tree
Saying something kind to a stranger

These acts may seem small, but they accumulate, and over time they form a new rhythm — and new meaning.

Support Your Journey: Get Our Ebook

For a more structured way to explore purpose in the wake of life change, download our Quest for Meaning: 10 Exercises on Purpose.

This beautifully crafted guide includes:

Step-by-step exercises grounded in Logotherapy and Existential Analysis
Journaling prompts to uncover values and direction
Practical tools to deal with emptiness, loneliness, and life transitions

Whether you’re in crisis or simply at a crossroads, this workbook will help you rediscover a path that is uniquely yours.

Final Thoughts

Major life changes will always be difficult — but they are also invitations to deepen, evolve, and reconnect with what truly matters.

Existential analysis and logotherapy do not promise quick fixes. They honor the depth and complexity of the human spirit. They ask us not to ignore our suffering, but to listen to it — because in that pain lies the seed of transformation.

If you’re struggling with loneliness, a lack of direction, or the feeling that you don’t fit in anywhere, know this:

You are not broken. You are in a sacred process of becoming.

And in this process, purpose is not something you find — it’s something you build, moment by moment, choice by choice.

Resources and Next Steps

References

Frankl, V. E. (2006). Man’s Search for Meaning. Boston: Beacon Press. (Original work published 1946)

Frankl, V. E. (1988). The Will to Meaning: Foundations and Applications of Logotherapy. New York: Meridian.

Längle, A. (2003). The search for meaning in life and the existential fundamental motivations. International Journal of Existential Psychology and Psychotherapy, 1(1).

Längle, A. (2016). Existential Analysis: An Introduction. Innsbruck: Tyrolia-Verlag.